Women: Ask for What You Want, You’re Being Judged Either Way – Part II

A Gemisode® Series – Part II

Women are judged regardless of their actions, so our belief is that you might as well go ahead and ask for what you need, want, and, let’s be frank, very often already deserve. In Part I, we got real about  the double standards women face in the workplace and the negative impact of these biases on their career progression and satisfaction. We also highlighted the importance of negotiating and how cultural and societal expectations can discourage women from advocating for themselves. Now, it’s time to talk strategy, specifically actionable strategies that women can lean into to help them advocate for themselves more both in and outside of the workplace. 

1. Be Clear on What You Want and Why

Successful advocacy and negotiations begin with clarity—on your goals and why they matter to you. Identify what you are looking for—whether a salary increase, promotion, flexible working hours, or additional responsibilities—and then work to articulate why these goals are important to you and will benefit the other party. This clarity not only helps you present a compelling case but also guides your negotiation strategy.

Example: If you’re seeking a promotion, outline how your current role has prepared you for this advancement. Detail the skills you’ve developed, the contributions you’ve made, and the positive impact your efforts have had on clients, your team, and the organization. Being specific about what you want, why it matters, and the benefit to everyone else if your request is supported strengthens your negotiation position.

2. Know Your Value: Build Your Metrics

Understanding your value key—in other words, know your numbers! This means creating and presenting metrics that demonstrate your impact. Even if you don’t have direct numbers, you can build metrics from qualitative achievements. For instance, if you joined a team and reduced client complaints from 100% to 0%, that’s a significant metric. If you improved a process that saved your company money, that’s another metric. By highlighting your achievements, you empower yourself because metrics = impact, and impact = leverage.

Example: If you led a project that enhanced client satisfaction. Quantify this improvement with metrics such as reduced complaints, increased positive feedback, or improved client retention rates. This data not only showcases your contributions but also provides concrete evidence of your value.

3. Level Up Your Language, Level Up Your Leverage

Crafting a compelling narrative around your achievements is essential. Use storytelling to connect your experiences with the value you bring to the organization. Clear and concise language helps avoid misinterpretations and reinforces your professional credibility. One effective way to structure your story is through the Problem-Solution-Impact (PSI) approach:

• Problem: Identify a specific challenge or issue that was affecting your team or organization.
• Solution: Describe the actions you took to address the problem.
• Impact: Highlight the tangible results and positive outcomes of your solution.

Example: If you implemented a new workflow that increased team productivity, share that story through the PSI lens:

• Problem: The team was consistently missing project deadlines due to an inefficient workflow, leading to client dissatisfaction and increased stress among team members.
• Solution: You conducted a thorough analysis of the existing processes, identified bottlenecks, and developed a streamlined workflow. This included adopting new project management tools and providing training to the team.
• Impact: As a result, team productivity increased by 30%, all project deadlines were met, client satisfaction scores improved by 25%, and team morale was significantly boosted.

By structuring your narrative this way, you not only showcase your impact but also help others understand the value you bring. It makes your accomplishments clear, relatable, and memorable.

Remember, in a world that keeps telling you to be more confident—and has sometimes weaponized that word against you—focusing on your competence is key. Competence builds confidence. When you concentrate on what you know and what you’ve accomplished, others read that as confidence.

4. Practice Makes Permanent

Negotiation is a skill that improves with practice. The good news is, you’re already negotiating in everyday life without even realizing it.

Everyday Negotiations:

• Deciding When to Get Out of Bed: You negotiate with yourself about hitting the snooze button or starting your day.
• Dealing with Children: Convincing your child to eat their vegetables or do their homework involves negotiation techniques.
• Choosing Plans with Friends: Deciding on a restaurant or activity requires discussion and compromise to reach a mutual agreement.

By acknowledging these everyday negotiations, you can see that you already possess the skills needed to negotiate effectively. The same principles apply in professional settings: understanding interests, communicating clearly, and finding mutually beneficial solutions.

Developing the habit of negotiating regularly and refining your approach based on feedback and outcomes is also important. Preparation is key—research market standards, anticipate potential counterarguments, and rehearse your negotiation points.

Example: Start by negotiating in low-stakes professional situations to build your confidence. This could involve discussing deadlines, requesting resources for a project, or seeking opportunities for professional development. As you become more comfortable, apply these skills to more significant negotiations, such as salary increases or promotions. After each negotiation, reflect on what worked well and where you can improve.

Lastly, biases exist—that’s the bottom line. However, by embracing negotiations and self-advocacy, you can learn to view workplace negotiations as your pathway to new opportunities for growth. At the end of the day, you’re going to be judged anyway—might as well make it count!

Ready to level up your leverage? Connect with us to learn how our workplace advisory and coaching services can help!